Are you going to make it?

That's the first thing Dr. H said when he touched my abdomen on Friday afternoon.
His concern was stomping all over his face.

I gained 3 pounds, my first weight gain in this pregnancy.
BP was good, which has been a concern...I've been swollen.
They checked me for a UTI, which has also been a concern because of where my pain is located in my lower abdomen.
My doctor came in, and even though I hadn't said a word about my contractions or my pain he immediately asked me if I was going to be able to make it another 6-7 more weeks (as opposed to 8 more weeks which is when my c-section is scheduled).
I just looked at him, and he said that he would ask me again when he saw me in two weeks.

I'll be blunt...he's concerned.

Why?
Medically the baby and I are just fine. I am in physical pain but nothing seems to be wrong, seems to be a muscle or a ligament issue.

My uterus is currently measuring at 42 weeks. Yeah....42 weeks. Did I mention I'm only 31 weeks?

Howard and I explained the contractions, I told them about the frequency of braxton hicks and the dozen or so real ones that had no consistency to them. He, once again, told me to trust my judgment because he trusts me. Call him if I'm concerned and if I'm not, then rest, rest and more rest.
He told me above all to take it easy. No more then 30 minutes at a time on my feet (I shall powerwalk through the grocery store, it shall be hilarious).

I learned something new today. He discussed my c-section with his partner (Dr. B) who assisted in the c-section with the twins. They are hoping that Parker will turn either breech or head down. Why does that matter when I'm having a c-section? Well, if he is head up or down then they are going to give me a traditional bikini cut on my uterus instead of the vertical one like I had with the twins. If Parker is transverse (sideways) we will have to go with the vertical incision again. Which will mean a longer time in surgery and more recovery time.
I didn't realize that a bikini cut on my uterus was even possible now that I had already had a vertical. I am super freakin happy about that!

Even happier when my Dr. H realized that Parker has turned and is now breech! Dr. H truly doesn't think he will turn again because he's running out of room. Big time.

So, next appointment is September 10th with a check (ick) and an ultrasound.

Week 1- Survivied-barely

Last Saturday we took my sullen Brother in law home, went to eat endless pasta at Olive Garden and saw a sight we never thought we'd see again. Rain. It rained while we were driving and my heart stopped. I love rain.
Saturday night and Sunday we finally got our house back to normal. And then it was just...us. No house guests, no roommates, just us. I could not stop smiling. Seriously, I looked like the joker.

Monday came around and it was Kenzie's first day of 3rd grade. She was so excited and refused to wear the dress she had picked out (and let me tell you this child LOVES dresses) and wore her school shirt instead.
She looked way too big. I truly love this picture though.
She had an amazing day. She was a bit quiet on the way home, because frankly she was exhausted. But she loved it! Her week has continually gotten better and better and she is really enjoying 3rd grade so far. Of course, they haven't started homework either. Her teacher is awesome, sending me daily email notifications of how the day went and what they accomplished. I am now officially an 'at home' helper. Considering my lack of mobility, I'm so glad that I can help!

Maddie is doing well with the adjustment. Monday was odd for her. I woke her to take Kenzie to school on her first day (and yes, I cried, I do every year) but Maddie didn't cry when her sissy left us. She was ok. She didn't have a nap so her sleep schedule was beyond wonky. Since then it has improved a ton! Hence, I was 10 minutes late for putting her down for her nap and she fell asleep on the couch on her own yesterday. So sleeping is going smoothly so far. YES! She misses her sister, no doubt. She would rather go to school with her, and asks if she can every morning. She's adapting.

I'm not.
Emotionally I'm fine, although I will admit...I miss Kenzie so much when she is not here. Physically, not so great. I have been having this lower abdomen/lower ligament pain that is becoming increasingly more and more uncomfortable. I gasp in pain when I lift my right leg to slide a flip flop on. Literally lifting my right leg at all, even taking a step with that leg creates shooting pain in places no one should have pain as well as my leg, hip, back and lower abdomen. The thing is, it's even worse when I am laying down, trying to turn from one side to the other or just changing positions of my leg. The pain is much more severe.
My back of course is still killing me, but every other day back rubs al la tennis ball seem to be helping a lot. I am having trouble showering while standing and there is no way my whale butt is going to try to get in the tub. So every day when that time comes around, I literally throw a mini tantrum in my head. Mostly. It's pretty darn painful to drive as well. Climbing in and out of the car is a great effort and my belly is getting very close to the stearing wheel. The days of driving for this human oven are coming to a close.

Parker seems to be doing just fine, still moving quite often. I think he may of turned either totally breech (he was transverse-sideways) or head down, who knows. Doesn't really matter since he's not coming out the old fashioned way, but it would help on the pain...I think. I have a doctor's appointment today for a basic check. I have had a lot of braxton hicks and over a dozen real contractions. Which of course, scares the hell out of Howard.

I have officially chilled

After I was able to get some sleep that didn't involve waking myself up with myself sobbing in pain (yes, I've done that often the past few weeks) I finally feel a little bit rational.
Pregnant...rational...trust me, I'm in shock.

My brother in law, who in truth has done nothing really wrong (however annoying) will be leaving sometime Saturday. I managed to keep from actually snapping my twig at him even though everything he did bothered me at no fault of his, lol.

Along with the sleep, my husband finally was able to give me a back rub which helped immensely. After moving my parents in last weekend he was too sore to move, so it was me giving him back rubs. Then we kept going to bed so late and had a ton of school work. There were just too many obstacles in the way from my back rubs. And if you have ever been largely pregnant with sciatic nerve pain you know how important they are. Literally I had a hard time walking to the kitchen and back to sit on my bed...let ALONE sit on the couch.

Last night we went to Kenzie's school and met her new teacher. She has a very sweet teacher this year, like every other year and I know that they are going to love each other to death. Kenzie already felt comfortable around her to hug her goodbye at last nights open house. A lot of Mack's reservations have calmed and now she's a bit excited to go back to school, which makes me feel better too. The change is mostly going to be with the schedule and Maddie. Maddie is going to miss her sister so much! I'm going to miss her too, Kenzie and I have spent 98% of this summer together. I'm curious to see what Monday brings.

Oh please

Please Jesus, Santa Claus or Hare Krishna...
GIVE ME MY HOUSE BACK!
We have not had our house to ourselves since the beginning of June.
My in laws were in town every weekend
Then my mother in law stayed for over a week
Then my parents moved in the day after she left
They moved out on Friday into their new apartment
And now my brother in law is here

My husband doesn't seem to get it, because it doesn't inconvenience him in any way. I am trying to do homework, make phone calls, watch presentations, write hard ass papers and I'M PREGNANT! And I cannot go into MY bedroom and sit on MY bed without him being in here.

I desperately need a break and I am so totally losing it. Howard mentioned him staying through the weekend and possibly another week. He will not physically be a man by the end of the weekend if we still have a houseguest.

The 29 week ultrasound

Almost 3 years ago, I had another 29 week ultrasound. The tech was measuring my twins. Seeing Maddie wiggle around, significantly bigger then Morgan. Everything looked fine on both babies, then she went to find the heartbeats. Found Maddie's thumping away and Morgan's solid little torso with no recognizable heartbeat.
3 years ago at my last 29 week ultrasound I found out that my sweet Morgan had passed away. And immediately worried for Maddie's safety.

Today is my 29 week ultrasound for Parker and he has been kicking me all day. Thank you little man for the reassurance. I will feel so much better when I get to the doctors and hear his heartbeat and see him dancing on the screen for us. To see him safe...and thriving.

Decisions & Pregnancy are a bad mix

I am at a loss. Now I know why I am on my third pregnancy and have never had a baby shower. Pregnant women don't do decisions well.
Ok, so since this is more then likely my last pregnancy my family and I really want to have a baby shower. I've always wanted one, and never had one. First pregnancy was a teen pregnancy...and...yeah. Second pregnancy had one scheduled but I canceled the plans for it when Morgan passed away, I just couldn't do it. We did have a welcome home party for her though. It was nothing like a baby shower though. My sister made dinner, my family came, one friend and my mother in law we ate and they all got to see Maddie when she came out of the hospital.
Howard wanted to throw one for me this time around. I know that is not proper ettiquite but he's my husband, and most men don't want to be a part of this type of thing, anyone who knows him KNOWS he is not most men. He figures he knows what I like and what I don't like. He would be able to be a part of the baby shower (because he does actually want to be) but still be able to make sure it ran smoothly.

But now a wrench has been thrown into it and I am not sure how to proceed. While having lunch with my sister the other day my sis mentioned throwing a shower for our pregnant cousin. My mother immediately asked about a shower for me. Now, I love my sister but we are not close by any means. At all. I frankly didn't want to ask her for anything, and now my mother has her thinking she needs to throw a shower for me and of course being the politically correct person she is, she agreed immediately.

So, she wants to throw a shower for me on September 20th (no she did not ask me about the date, but that is the only time she has time to do it). This will not work for many reasons. My 4 besties from high school are not able to make that date because they are going out of town. Not only that but they ARE out of town so on a Sunday they would have to drive here then straight back then deal with work and school on Monday morning. Not too fair. My oldest bestie is moving into her brand new house either the weekend before that OR THAT WEEKEND so she wouldn't be able to make it either!

So what do I do?
Do I tell my sister 'Thanks but no thanks' and have her offended and my family won't show up at my shower if I throw one?
Do I just allow her to throw it and just deal with the fact that my friends won't be able to make it?
Do I have the shower thrown by her then throw another one that will work for my friends schedule? 2 showers?

ANYONE who has an option on this, pleaseeeeeeeeee give me a piece of it. I need help, maybe professional help.